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We've all had one. You know, that high maintenance vehicle that 'nickle and dimed' you to death. That one car that you should have sold long before you finally did. Replacement was an viable option many miles before it was actually a reality. The car that was almost like a family member, name and all. Eventually, though, the time came when you simply had to remove it from the fleet because it was costing too much in constant repairs. The time had come and it had to go. You could no longer afford to have it in the family. The parting was hard, but necessary because of the out of pocket expense it caused you on a routine basis.
Everyone knows what I'm talking about. We've all been there.
There are also inter-personal relationships which border on the same issue. You know, those 'high-maintenance' friendships. That friend who always has a problem needing a solution. That person who always sees the one cloud on the distant horizon. That person who pulls down the atmosphere of every room they enter and every conversation they engage in because of their tendency toward gloom and doom. You know who I mean because you've met them. We all know them. They're in our churches. They're in our small group. They're in our circle of friends. They're everywhere.
Surely sometime it's necessary to weigh the cost with the benefit received from such a relationship. Surely it's eventually excuseable to cease intimate relations with such an individual. Certainly such a person drags others down. No one can deny a sense of premonition when that person enters and relief when they depart. Why should you be forced to maintain such a relationship?
Are their problems legitimate? Possibly. Are their concerns valid? Probably. Do they offer verifiable dilemma's? Likely, but shouldn't they just 'act' happy? Shouldn't they force a bounce into their step and a chirp in their voice? Shouldn't they smile in the face of such disaster as they seem to perpetually experience?
Shouldn't they?
Shouldn't we?
Shouldn't I?
Could someone check my fluids? Please!
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1 comment:
You know, I've been a high-maintenance friend, and I've had h-m friends. The latter is difficult, but the former is even moreso. I knew at the time that I dragged people down, but I was desperately trying to keep my own head above water. I did eventually come through that time, and I'm very thankful to the friends who put up with me through it. I guess that has made me more tolerant of h-m friends. I know that ideally they wouldn't be that way, and they really do need support. Obviously, there are times when you're not stable enough to steady someone who's going under, but if you are, thank God that you can help. And when you're the one going under, well thank God for the friends who are there to steady you, because He is the one who sent them.
And no, you shouldn't just "act happy." I know it seems that way, and probably people around you do like for you to be happy, but that is the surest way to go completely under. How can anyone help if they don't know there is a need? And true friends will feel worse if you don't let them know what you're truly thinking.
So that's my two cents on the matter, fwiw.
I feel like I've missed out on a lot with you. I don't get here often because the computer I usually use won't load your page. I suppose I really ought to update that browser...
God bless!
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