November 19, 2007 – April 28, 2008

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Five months and one week.

My term as unemployed officially comes to an end tomorrow, April 28, 2008 at 7:00 am. It’s a dream come true, and more. 23 weeks ago I thought my world had crashed beyond reconstruction. During the last 160 days I have learned that no matter what, no matter when, no matter how, my Father is more than faithful to provide for the needs of His own. I’ve learned that He is not only faithful, but quite creative in His ways also! Never a lack was known. Never a need was unmet. Never a want was hardly unfulfilled. God has been good and many of you have been part of His provision. Thank you very much!! (…and that seems too meager to suffice.)

Starting tomorrow I will be (unofficially) office manager for Mulch Plus in Middletown, OH. While I thought I was looking for a position in full-time sales, this position will be one of counter sales/point of sale, accts receivable/payable, payroll, general merchandising, maintaining relationships with wholesale outlets, suppliers and municipalities (for reception of ‘green waste’), along with general marketing of products and services. This job is a dream. Period. Actually, it must be better than a dream, because NEVER (not even once in 5 months) did I think of pursuing something quite like this. I’ve pursued (seemingly) everything else; from selling to concrete blocks, to light bulbs, to computer networks, to telephone systems, to sod, to general construction fasteners, to running a rental counter, to general retail sales floor, to asst chaplain at prison, to referral specialist at a children’s home, to pans, to sweepers, to knives, to Avon (just kidding on the last 4); but NEVER did I dream of this type of job. That’s how I know that God had it hand-picked and was preparing me to receive it. Less than one week ago this position pursued me, and a few days later I’m hired, the details are all worked out and I’ve already gotten my first raise BEFORE ever showing up!

God is good! Too good for how ‘clamoring’ I tend to be.

I’ve enjoyed the last several months. I feel like I’ve learned to know my youngest two children in a way I never knew them. I’ve been able to spend time with Renita (read: drive each other crazy), help with mundane household tasks (I potty-trained Dietrich), participate in pupil shuttling, come and go with seeming leisure, etc. But all that changes tomorrow. This will be quite different, but who am I to complain against the Lord’s providing? There will be compromises. My prison volunteer opportunities will be drastically reduced, but my ministry will not be eliminated altogether in that area. I’ll still have my Thursday evenings and Sunday afternoons. My casual breakfast and lunch meetings will be almost non-existent. ‘Sleeping in’ will be terminology which no longer fits in my vernacular except the occasional weekend. I’ll beat up everyone in my house on a daily basis and leave most of them unconscious. (Read that last sentence again to make sure you understood the weak humor.)

But……….God is VERY good!!__________________________________________________

Missed It

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I meet with a group of men for Bible study every other Saturday morning. Two weeks ago I was out of town, so I missed it. Apparently that schedule disruption messed up my internal calendar because this morning would have been the next opportunity and I missed it entirely. I have been slightly less than gracious toward others when they 'forget' so I guess it's my turn to eat humble pie.

edit: I found out that everybody else forgot this morning too!
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Resigned Disappointment

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I received the following letter in the mail from Wernle Children's Home:

Dear Aaron:
We appreciated the opportunity to speak with you recently concerning employment opportunities with Wernle Children's Home, serving children and families for 129 years in the Richmond community.

I write to inform you that we [sic] while your qualifications are impressive; we selected another candidate to fill our Referral Development position. We will consider your qualifications and experience for future openings as they become available.

I am sorry that this response cannot be more favorable. We extend our best to you in your professional pursuits. Thank you for considering Wernle Children's Home as a potential employer.

Respectfully,

Tim Branson, PHR
Human Resources Director


So, I suppose that's that! Tomorrow is another day, and another interview. This position would be an office manager/inside sales/general accounting for a mulch producer and distributor in Middletown, OH. I guess the Father alone knows what He has planned......................and I simply wait for it to fall in place...............................!!
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Seek Peace and Pursue It

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I preached from Ephesians 4:25-32 yesterday. I titled the message, 'Seek Peace and Pursue It'. When the message was over the feedback was nothing but affirmative. However, as I assessed my own reaction throughout the afternoon, I have to admit something was wrong with it. It wasn't that I couldn't get my thoughts across. My notes worked well. I was able to articulate what I wanted to say. The flow from thought to thought seemed smooth, etc. I'm not able to quite put my finger on it, but something was missing, something was over-spoken, I wasn't quite in tune with the Holy Spirit, or something. All I know is something felt amiss in my spirit as I reminisced on the sermon throughout the afternoon. I hope that next time I'll be more alert to the Spirit and not be a grief to Him.
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Self-Revelation

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Six years ago when I was converted my Christian experience was mostly emotional. I suppose this is the normal response of a heart which being consumed with sin has been set free. Nevertheless, the whole of my conviction lay solely in the realm of emotionalism. Much of what I was 'called' to do stemmed from a sensational approach to my relationship with the Lord. The scripture was, to me, a book of proverbial quotable quotes. My approach to the scripture was casual and haphazard. My prayer life dwelt almost exclusively in the arena of feelings and emotions. My Christian experience was mystical. I was 'spiritual'.

For several years I lived like that. I surrounded myself with others who experienced Christ in much the same way. We all felt good to be Christians. However, I found myself noticing an emptiness in my experience. I found joy waxing, peace waning and reality wandering. Then, by God's grace and favor, I met a brother who challenged my approach to the scripture. He introduced me to a radically different concept of Christianity and its relationship with scripture and ultimately with the Savior. This new awareness brought life to my experience. Suddenly I found reality in a whole new way. But now............

Now I find myself taking an academic approach to scripture. Since I resist sensationalism and I don't trust my emotions, I approach the Bible much like a student approaches a textbook. And beyond that, I find myself preaching from this postion of academia. I have realized that I handle the word like a teacher handles his lessons. I have somehow lost sight of the fact that the scripture is a living word. Somewhere in my self-awareness I lost connection with the relevation of the Spirit through the word, and it has become cold, hard facts to be articulated/received from a conservative, religious perspective.

Please pray with me for a proper perspective of the Lord, the revelation of His will through scripture, and the proper relationship of His Spirit to our hearts.
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Intense

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THAT was the most intense interview/meeting I have ever sat through in my life. I loved every minute of it. Now I just need to 'come down' emotionally before the service at NCCF tonite. The CEO said that I should know something by the end of this week (that's tomorrow) or the first of next! I think I would absolutely LOVE the position. The Lord knows what's going to happen, all I have to do is wait (that's the hard part).

On another note, we leave at 5:30 am tomorrow for Athens, WI for the weekend. See ya Monday evening!
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Is This The One?

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I have an interview scheduled tomorrow at 2:00 pm with Wernle Children's Home in Richmond, IN for the position of Referral Specialist.
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100 Sentences - Writing Assignment

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1) I will not quote narrow-minded, religious bigots on my blog.
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Is It A Call?

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How does a person know for sure when God is calling them into a life of total trust?

In the last 4 months I haven't been able to find full-time employment. God has been faithful. Every month there has been enough money to pay the bills on time and buy groceries. We haven't even been required to lower our standard of living. Nevertheless, I have a hard time trusting for the next time. It seems so irresponsible to assume God wants to provide for my family in this way long-term.

As I continue pursuing employment I run into one road block after another disappointment after another empty promise. The jobs I have a good 'gut' feeling about get filled by a 'more qualified' candidate or one with 'contacts'. The people who say they'll call me back regardless never do. The people who 'believe in me' can't offer me what my budget needs to break even.

All the while, in my heart I continue feeling a call to a more full-time ministry. The prison I volunteer at (New Castle Correctional Facility) is always asking, crying, begging for more 'first shift' volunteers. My heart is pulled there, my passion is there, my fulfillment comes from those kind of things. However, there's one catch, it's all volunteer. There is no current, nor is there any prospective, staff positions at NCCF for which I'm qualified. Is God really calling me to full-time volunteer ministry? If so, why does it feel so irresponsible? If so, how will my family be provided for? If so, why am I so afraid to walk in faith? If not, how do I explain the burden on my heart?
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